Retirement and Our Little Willy

My hubby, of almost 47 years now, and I retired from the work force in December 2001,
ending his teaching and coaching career of 30 years
and my mostly-parttime employment of a little more than 20.

To say we instantly loved retirement is an understatement!
One of our friends said it took us five whole minutes to adjust!
 That being said, we both had enjoyed our careers;
 he loved his "kids" at school and on the ball field as well as his teacher friends
and Farragut community parents and supporters.  

My jobs and co-workers - at MTSU, Management Systems, Central Baptist Church of Ftn City, The Silk Purse, and Trivette and Osborne, DDS -
were like family to me.  I treasured my days with them.

But it was time!  John said it was time to leave it to someone younger, with more patience.
And we didn't look back.  So, we moved on to the next chapter of our lives:  being retirees!

That was 2001.  We had aging and needy parents who needed us.
We had adult children with whom we loved spending time,
we wanted to travel, pursue hobbies and interests, spend time with friends, volunteer ...

Early on, John started talking about getting a puppy.  Our son had a Basset Hound we loved,
but Merlin was a little more dog than we could handle!
He literally pulled me off my feet and dragged me around on more than one occasion.
We liked hounds, and our friends at the lake had a darling little Miniature Dachshund named Oscar.  John thought we should look at that breed so he started making inquiries and watching the want ads.  I wasn't convinced, as I thought we had enough to take care of with his dad and my mother.
So we put our doggy search on hold during 2002.

2003 arrived, and I began to warm up to the puppy idea, much to John's delight.
One day in early July, John saw an ad from a couple in Oliver Springs
who had a litter of mini's who were ready for adoption.
It was raining out, and John suggested we take a ride to Oliver Springs,
"...to just take a look at the puppies!"  So off we went.
One look later, we were totally in love.  There in a basket lay a tiny blonde male  pup, less than a pound, sleeping away...absolutely precious.
  Sold!  Only we hadn't brought money!  So off to the nearest Home Federal, in Oak Ridge we went.  The owners were having their second baby the next day and really needed the last puppy to be gone.  So we accommodated!  "He'll be named Willy!" John announced.
Perfect name for our new family member!

Here we are, 13 years later.  We've traveled many miles with our portable little doggy:  he's been to Oklahoma numerous times, to Texas and Florida, to Savannah and Hilton Head and Charleston and St Augustine...all over TN, GA, NC...He thinks Waterside at Norris is HIS lake!  He travels like a champ, mostly sleeping but eating when we do and walking and pottying when it's time.  

When he was 4 1/2 years old, he suffered a ruptured disk
 and had to have major surgery to get him walking again.
Dachshunds are prone to back injury, as their backs are long and need another set of legs midway.
 He recovered and was given a new lease on life with mineral supplements and lots of TLC.  

Now Willy is in his golden days and has some new health concerns, those of the cognitive nature.
He 's a little off his game, moving slower, sleeping more, doing a few quirky things.    His thermostat is a little off so he is very cold-natured and overheats easily.
But with new meds, food, and supplements, he's perked up and doing well.
He loves his people:  us, our children, Barrett...friends and strangers, everyone!
He's bark-y and nosy and somewhat stubborn 😊 But smart and sweet and loving.
He kisses me goodnight and snuggles between us, way under the covers.
 He gets excited to go to the park, eat treats, and run wiener dog races (not official ones, just racing around fields or vacant ball fields or around the house!). He enjoys his life, and he brings us great joy.  He's done a good job of filling our empty nest.  He loves us unconditionally...and we him.

So...here's to our little Willy!  The best doggy in the world!  

A Quiet Axis

Axis...a centerpiece...something which things revolve around...

Our earth turns on its axis.

Our cars depend on axes for their wheels and tires to spin.

Picture a globe...with a north and south pole,

and an axis joining them.

An axis keeps the globe on course.

It is straight and perfect.

It does not bend nor wobble.

It is necessary, important, vital.

Now,

picture a person, in the role of axis:

in the family...

in the workplace...

in the community...

in the church.

I want to be that person,

to my family.

A quiet, strong, dependable axis.

When things are "normal,"

I am there.

When things are bumpy,

I am there to smoothe things out.

When things are stressful,

I can offer a calm word of encouragement.

When things are happy,

I am there to rejoice.

When things are sad, 

I can provide a shoulder upon which to cry,

a hand-up,

a comforting presence.

Yes, a family needs that quiet axis.

It doesn't necessarily have  to be the mom.

But usually things DO revolve around her.

She's the glue...the ever-present person...

the necessary element

in holding things together,

family-wise.

Of course, it's a balance.

Dad is important, as he is the strong male presence.

He works hard.

He leads.

He mediates and counsels and coaches and encourages.

He hugs and gives pats on the back and high-fives.

He sets the standard of fairness.

But I'm the one who can be the calm in the storm...

the quiet in the midst of uproar,

the peace within the crisis.

My attitude and my demeanor and my reactions

can either make or break the situation.

If I react with thunder and lightning,

the storm roars on.

But if I am still and quietening,

the uproar ceases and is replaced with calm.

Help me, Lord, to be Your quiet axis in my family unit.

Instill in me the peace which passes understanding.

Calm me first so that I can be the calming factor to those I love.

A quiet axis.

That's what I desire to be.

Memorial Day

This being Memorial Day, I am in "memory mode"... memories of days gone by, 

memories of people gone by, memories of sacrifices made by those who paid for our freedom

with their lives...or limbs...or peace of mind.

I'm also thinking of those gone too soon:  babies, children, young people,

young adults or those middle aged ones who had so much to offer,

so many who loved them, so much more to do and contribute.

And those who had lived good, long lives but whose bodies just wore out...

or succumbed to disease or accident.

I'm thinking of those serving their country and its citizens in present times:

here, there, everywhere around the globe,

keeping our lands and seas and skies safe.

Those brave ones who served in the past, from the World Wars, in Europe,

the South Pacific, 

to Korea, Vietnam, the Middle East...

We cannot imagine what dangers they faced,

what horrors they endured,

the scars, both physical and emotional, they wear.

I'm thinking of "the good ole days"...

days when possessions were scarce...money was short...but life was simpler.

...when going barefoot, playing hiding-go-seek in the dark, 

laying on your back in the cool evening grass, wishing upon a star,

climbing trees and picking strawberries and swimming in the pond...

rock-hopping in the cool mountain streams,

or digging to China, playing house or dolls or shooting cap guns

...was the best form of free entertainment.

Birthday parties consisted of cupcakes at the picnic table, with party hats...

Vacations were long road trips, in an unairconditioned car,

caravaning with other family members...

buying canteloupe on the roadside for 5 cents each!

Arriving in time for a quick run down to the beach 

before sitting down to a tomato sandwich on squishy white bread,

slathered with mayonnaise and salt and pepper...

having to put Fizzies in the foul-tasting sulphur water that plaqued the beach communities,

to make it palatable...

going to the ice house for huge blocks of ice to keep our groceries cool,

as the old Victorian beachhouse 'fridge just couldn't accommodate all

the food needed by the 20 something family members there for the week.

Those memories are precious and priceless.

Fast-forward to this day and age of electronics, instant communication,

Facebook and Twitter and Instagram...

of so many gadgets and passwords and stuff to learn and keep-up with...

It's not bad...it's not all good...it's just not simple,

especially when you hit senior-citizen status 

and really like simplicity and quiet times and some of the qualities

that seem to have gone-by-the-wayside 

as technology and advances are made that are really wonderful

but rather complicating at the same time.

So, I'll just keep on remembering today, 

those who have gone on...those fun times of childhood and youth,

those who have fought and died,

the years of early marriage and parenthood and of all the lessons

learned plus a few times a good do-over might have been appropriate!

And I'll cherish those memories, adding to them with precious memories

in the making...of adult children with so much wisdom and so much to offer,

of grandchildren with their eyes aglow, their boundless energy, 

their faith-in-the-making and endless questions that help them learn...

their sweet smiles and vast ability to laugh and live and love...

Happy Memorial Day, friends

Enjoy your day and savor your memories,

while being ever-so-grateful to those

who have contributed to our freedoms and to our welfare.

We are because of them:.

Many are gone but are certainly not forgotten.

To those still here, THANK YOU!

Ferdinand

One of my favorite stories is that of Ferdinand, a little bull who was born and lived in Spain.


His story was written and published in 1936, but his message is as pertinent today as it was almost 80 years ago.  It has been listed as one of the top 40 children's books of all times.  It's a wonderful story, full of truth and beauty.


Here's Ferdinand's story in a nutshell:


"All the other little bulls he lived with would run and jump and butt their heads together, but not   Ferdinand.  He liked to sit just quietly and smell the flowers.  He had a favorite spot out in the pasture under a cork tree.  It was his favorite tree and he would sit in its shade all day and smell the flowers."
I like that about Ferdinand.  He marched to the beat of  his own drummer.  He liked the other little bulls.  He was their friend.  But he just didn't like to do all that rough and tumble stuff.  He was just content with his own quiet little world where he could sit and enjoy the beauty of nature.


"Ferdinand's mother saw that he was not lonesome, and because she was an understanding mother, even though she was a cow, she let him just sit there and be happy."
What a mom.  She understood her little boy.  He wasn't lonely; he was happy!  She encouraged his uniqueness, not succumbing to the  ever-present peer pressure...the competition...that seems to pervade the world of parents-raising-children.  She loved him with an unconditional love that allowed him to be just who he was, without judgment or interference.  It was based on her hard-wired mother-love that God gives and that listening moms hear with their instincts.  Kudos to mama cow!




The story goes on:  it is time for the annual bull fights in Madrid, and all the other now-grown-up bulls wanted to be picked to fight the matador.  They had grown up fighting each other, butting and sticking each other with their horns. But not Ferdinand.  He had grown up, too, but was still content...happy to just sit under his tree and smell the flowers.  He had no desire whatsoever to fight anyone or anything.




One day five men with funny hats came to pick the biggest, fastest, roughest bull.  "All the other bulls ran around snorting and butting, leaping and jumping so that the men would think that they were very very strong and fierce and pick them."  But not Ferdinand.  "He knew that they wouldn't pick him, and he didn't care.  So he went out to his favorite cork tree to sit down."


Instead of plopping down on the soft, green grass, he sat down on a bumble bee!  The bee did what bees do when someone sits on them:  STING!  And it HURT!  "Ferdinand jumped up with a snort...ran around puffing and snorting, butting and pawing the ground as if her were crazy."
It just so happened that the five men in the funny hats saw him and were overjoyed!  They had found their fierce bull!  "Just the one for the bull fights in Madrid!  So they took him away for the bull fight day..."


Madrid was alive with flags waving, bands and a parade, with all the hoop-la and atmosphere of a Neyland Stadium on game-day..."lovely ladies had flowers in their hair...the Matador, the proudest of all -- he thought he was very handsome and bowed to the ladies.  He had a red cape and a sword and was supposed to stick the bull last of all."


And...the bull  "Ferdinand the Fierce" ...ran into the ring, and everybody screamed and applauded because the fight was about to begin; and they would get to see the mean bull snort and paw and butt, sticking his horns around.


"But not Ferdinand.  When he got to the middle of the ring, he saw the flowers in all the lovely ladies' hair and he just sat down quietly and smelled."  He wouldn't fight nor be fierce.  He just sat there!
Good ole Ferdinand.  Being himself.  Not caving.  Not caring.  No matter what.  Even when the Matador and his friends got mad, madder, maddest...because they couldn't show off and "win" over their opponent in front of all the people.


So...they took Ferdinand home.  "And for all I know he is sitting there still, under his favorite cork tree, smelling the flowers just quietly.  He is very happy." 


There are lots of lessons to be learned from Ferdinand's story:  how to mother, how to treat others, how to cope with peer pressure, how to be ourselves, how to be content...
Ah, the life of peace and contentment.  Something we all desire.  When we find ourselves in the midst of life, with all its pressures, problems, and stress:  some great big issues,  some little, some annoying, some life-changing...some life-threatening.  When feeling overwhelmed and under-equipped; when we would like to run away for just awhile... to refresh ourselves, recharge our batteries...We might just learn a lesson from our friend Ferdinand and just sit in the shade of a tree and relax.


It doesn't come naturally for some of us.  We are more like the majority of bulls:  busy running around, sometimes snorting, sometimes fighting not with horns or paws but with thoughts, words, opinions, solutions, on and on...getting nowhere, just adding to our worries and angst.


How about trying the quiet approach of being still...listening...finding peace and contentment through meditation, prayer, reading, studying, trusting.  The problems may not go magically away.  But by taking on a new attitude, we can better roll-with-the-flow; we can cope; we can do what needs to be done and come out at the other side with perhaps some scars and bandaids but no mortal wounds. We can survive and even thrive, with the help of others and our Best Friend who never leaves us nor forsakes us.


And a big thanks to Ferdinand for being you and for showing us a better way.  We may just flop down underneath your tree with you and be happy!

Honoring Those with Alzheimers

In memory of my mother, who died almost six years ago after fighting her good fight with Alzheimers...and honoring many friends and strangers alike who are in the fight of their lives with this sad disease...also honoring their caregivers and/or loved ones who bravely and unselfishly help in their journeys - (Reprising an article first published in May 2008:  "Mother:")


And so it goes...a life well-lived has ended, and another chapter of our lives has begun.  It is a true blessing from God that Mother is whole again, no longer hindered in any way.  She can remember, recognize, smile, laugh, talk, walk, and eat; she can hear well and do for herself again in the way she always wanted.  She can cook and garden and feed her birds and chase away those pesky squirrels!  She can drive her car and write her letters and work crossword puzzles til the cows come home.  She can read her newspaper and the Wall Street Journal til her heart's content...she can watch Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy and win most every time!...and plan one of her fun trips with Daddy to some interesting place in the world, making notes so that her journal would be complete with what they had for breakfast, lunch, and dinner and all they saw and new friends they met and what all the day had had in store for them.  She can bake homemade bread and Williamsburg Fresh Coconut Cake with Lemon Curd Filling....Jambalaya...Party Chicken with Artichokes...Chicken Basque...those famous Christmas goodies including Turkish Delight, pulled mints, dipped chocolates, and Spritz cookies in all the shapes from her cookie press...She can make a double batch of boiled custard and take it to an ailing neighbor...or even someone in the hospital...or perhaps a batch of oatmeal cookies or a loaf of datenut bread.  She can plant flat after flat of pansies and her vegetable garden of cantloupe, tomatoes, hills of peppers and Jerusalem artichokes and okra and green beans...She can tend her wildflowers:  columbine and lilies of the valley and Jack in the Pulpit and sit on her homemade bench, made from a couple downed trees, to admire the beauty of something only God could create.  She can listen to her music and play the piano by ear and enjoy her opera with the volume turned way up.  She can shop for bargains and redeem her coupons and visit with her friends at Food City again.  She can invite the neighbors and her golden friends from Norris and Clinton and Oak Ridge and Knoxville to a festive dinner party where she can use the good china and silver and arrange the centerpiece herself...She can invite a daughter to lunch out and they can do some shopping together with that lucky daughter always receiving a new item "just because."  She can be young again, vicariously through the grandchildren and those precious great-grands...laughing and joking and telling them tales of life as it used to be:  the depression years of her childhood, of surveying with her daddy "Papa," of living with her grandmother when times were so bad that Papa and Granny needed help feeding and raising their young; of college life and working at Drexel and moving to Anniston with Father Bill and Mama Stoney, as they were called from Grace Episcopal Church in Morganton to Grace Church in Anniston...of meeting and falling in love with her handsome friend Harry...and their marriage as the bells tolled VJ Day on that hot August afternoon in 1945...of the early years in Anniston and my brother's birth and then mine...of moving to Oak Ridge as Daddy's career dictated...and on to Norris and their beloved St Francis Church and all those fun days of our childhood in a small, safe, friendly community...then to Knoxville where they spent the next 50 years, continuing to raise children and being active in church and community and neighborhood and school affairs...Retirement for Daddy and all the fun they had traveling the Super Seniors tennis circuit, making new friends, with opportunities to visit and correspond...Daddy's illness and death and Mother's subsequent waning as Alzheimers entered the picture:  sad times as another chapter in her life began, that long journey of 8-9 years, one that would take her into the throes of silence and dependence on others.  She didn't like that, but she persevered, again showing that strength of character and resolve.  She seldom  complained, never whined, never felt sorry for herself, at least outwardly.  She adjusted to her new apartment, complete with her antiques and needlework on the walls...and was heartbroken when it became necessary to give it up and move on to assisted living, then special care for Alzheimers patients and then finally her last home in skilled nursing.  She made the best of it, though, in her stoic way...just part of the journey.  She was a joy to the staff, as she went about her day, cooperating and reading and even talking in a new poetic language marked by "to be" at the end of each phrase.  It was so sad for us to watch; but even with that, she plowed on, influencing others in the positive.  Her last two years were especially difficult as she lost more and more of the zest which made her HER...and her struggles with eating and swallowing and breathing worsened.  On May 15, 2008, we experienced the ultimate in bittersweetness:  we had lost her but she was free!  She was whole again!  She was reunited with her kind and gentle Harry...and best of all, because of her faith and trust in Him, she lives on in her new home, where she can serve in her new body with her new mind that is absolutely and perfectly clear and bright.  And so it goes..the circle of life.  We rejoice and thank God.

Riding the Roller Coaster

Well, after a four month hiatus, I'm back, blogging away!  Here's what's been going on, in my mind, as to why-or-why-not-continue-to-write-a-blog:


1.  I've been a writer since I was in the 4th grade (Mrs. Cothren told me so, after my essay on "What I Did on My Summer Vacation" ended up being my first book...40 pages long!)


2.  I can write my thoughts so much easier than speaking them.  Just ask anyone who has had to listen to me, especially if they are one of a crowd.  I was asked to present something to our church congregation...an Advent devotional .Writing it was no problem!  I did it in no time flat.  It was nearly impossible, however, for me to read/deliver it;  I nearly choked on the first sentence.  I DID manage to deliver my "speech," in a teary, high-pitched voice, but without fainting.  You get the picture.


3.  Writing is VERY therapeutic for me.  I can write down my thoughts and feel clarity...peace...resolution.


4.   So many are REALLY good at what they write:  but am I?  Sometimes I feel good about sharing my thoughts.  Many times, though, they are really just good for me.  I'm not funny...nor entertaining...nor eloquent.  I'm no theologian, though my thoughts are often on spiritual matters.  I'm not deep...nor am I on-the-cutting-edge of new thoughts on God or on the way-we-do-church...nor will I ever be praised by higher-ups in any field I can think of.  So...to be a writer, don't I need readers?  It's a dilemma in my mind.


5.  So, four months ago, I just put away my keyboard and concentrated on my main roles as wife, mother, Grandmommy, friend, and doggy-mommy...and have written just snippets of my thoughts as posts on Facebook...or in my journal.  It has been a good respite.. I've enjoyed my time away from my chronicling.  But I'm also missing it ! A lot.  So I decided to try again, just for the joy of writing.  And with the goal of not comparing myself and my writings to anyone else...nor their style...nor their opinions.


6.  Here it is:  my thought roller-coaster blog.  First since November 26, 2013.  Four months to the day.  It feels good to be back!

2013

So, today is November 26, 2013...11/12 of the year is gone...past history...and here we are a couple days before Thanksgiving, a month before Christmas, just over a month til the new year dawns.  I'm thinking back to this time last year, as I was pondering recent events and processing them, as I tend to do.  I had New Year's Resolutions on my mind and though a little premature, was thinking what I would "resolve" to do in 2013.

I had had fruit of the spirit on my mind lots, and so I resolved to build a basket of spiritual fruit in my life for the upcoming new year...plus a few more attributes that I felt would better my life and make me a little more Christlike.  It was a worthy goal.

Looking back, however, I think I fell well-short.  I have experienced some progress, but with me it seems to be one step up, two steps back.  Those wonderful attributes are very elusive, especially when things are rough or stressful, as most of our year has been.

I listed love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, kindness, self-control, etc and wrote about each for the first several months of the year.  As the year went on, and as things continued to spin somewhat out of control in some aspects, it seemed that I had created a monster of sorts with my lofty goals.  You know how it goes sometimes...pray for patience and then get tested...pray for peace and find yourself in the middle of an uproar...pray for self-control and then find yourself counting to 10 once every hour or so.

So defeating...so discouraging.

Then it dawned on me...just let it go.  Relax a little bit.  Cut yourself some slack.  Next year may be trying but I'd be willing to bet not as trying as this one has been.  Or tiring...no, make that not as exhausting.  I think it's setting up to be a GOOD year; I'm counting on it!  I think as our stressors mounted, my spirit of defeat increased incrementally...certainly not what I wanted or resolved.  I was letting my feeling of defeat overshadow my growth, and that fact was keeping me down and out.  Realizing what was going on did so much to allow me to just let go and let God be in control, as only He can.

God has never left us, never has forsaken us, still loves us, still undergirds us, especially when the going gets tough.  I think He is perhaps even a little proud of us for enduring and coming out of our tough year with gentler attitudes and still in one piece emotionally and physically.  We need His approval, His smiles, His hugs and encouragement.  He did not disappoint us at all.

So:  there's next year!  I have my list of around 15 very admirable and I think even attainable spiritual goals, and I intend to incorporate these traits into my life and heart.  I'm not resolving to do so, just to do my dead-level best to be all I can be, with God's help.  Could it be that I'm feeling more at peace already?  And growing some because of all the trials?  That would make them all worth while! 

My basket will not be full nor overflowing in 2013 but there's still tomorrow.  I won't take these for granted.  I will be open and receptive and expectant of/to these...they will still be my goals.  But no more pressure to have them in abundance or else.  I am going to be still and know that He is God, and I am His beloved child.  That's enough!!

My best wishes to each of you this Thanksgiving season.  As Christmas approaches, may the God of all our hopes and dreams and resolutions be very real to each of us, as we strive to follow more closely and to serve our fellowman with more light and life.

Good Words

While traveling down the interstate recently, I listened to one of my favorite radio teachers on Christian radio.  His introductory topic was about encouragement...about listening and responding with a good word or two that would help the other person feel better or to use his words, "make the other person's heart glad."

I liked that.  I needed to hear that.  I want to do that!

Being an empathetic person, I feel compelled to respond to a person's situation, dilemma, problem...I want to say something positive, something supportive, something helpful.  Sometimes, however, it's open mouth, insert foot.  Or it's taken wrongly.  Or not the right thing to say AT ALL.  Or too much advice.  Very discouraging, as my intentions are so good.  I feel like Paul:  I don't do (say) what I want to or I do (say) something I shouldn't have.

So, I have a new resolve to find that perfect "good word."  Perhaps it will best, meanwhile, while I learn, to say little and just listen.  Perhaps "less is more."  Maybe becoming a better listener will make me a better encourager.

So off I go on my new learning adventure:  finding good words.  I know what it feels like to be given a "good word."  I immediately feel better, more positive,  comforted, strengthened.  So I'll use that as my jumping off point:  I'll just try to feel and say what  I would want to hear if I were in that person's shoes. 

Life is hard, and we all find ourselves in difficult places.  We need encouragement, understanding, helpful words that lift our spirits and give us the will to go on, that assurance that everything will be all right.  Here's to "good words" - hearing them and speaking them.  May we find that delicate balance between just listening and knowing what to say and when to say it.  May my words, indeed, be good ones:  "May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be always acceptable" to God...and to the ones to whom they are spoken.

Lessons

Lazy summer days are good for reflecting, so here goes!

- Each day is a gift from God; I will not waste a single one.
- Every person is unique and wonderfully made, for a purpose; I will respect each one.
- Everything that happens to us prepares us for the next step in life; I will learn from each.
- God resides in the praises of His children; I will praise Him!
- God,  in His creation, is a Master artist; I appreciate each beautiful masterpiece.
- Little children learn what they live; I will be careful of each word and attitude they hear and see in me.
- Learning to be content in whatever circumstance I find myself is key; I will strive for contentment.
- Not every other person has been fortunate enough to have a good upbringing; I will try to remember this when my tendency to judge rises up.
- Gratitude is an attitude I love; I will not succumb to anything less.
- Sharing with others is something I learned in kindergarten; I will continue in this as long as I live.
- Pity-parties are self-defeating; I will not throw one.
- Listening beats talking any day of the week; I will listen more and talk less.
- Reacting is not fruitful, unless I do it with restraint and forethought; I will think first and act second.
- Being frugal reaps great rewards; I will not spend thoughtlessly or as retail therapy.
- Understanding others takes patience and understanding; God grant me these, please!
- Raising up a child in the way he shall grow:  a very hard job but so worth it.
- Life's challenges build spiritual muscles; I will be stronger, with God's help.
- Starting the day off with God, in His word, talking with Him, listening, and learning...recipe for a better day!
- Exercising your passions, your gifts, your talents:  very rewarding.
- Keeping the faith, through trials and hard times, keeps us keeping on.

Yes, an early summer morning, full of possibilities, is an open book, a blank slate.  Let's see what we can accomplish today.  It may not be earthshaking or award-winning, but it can be a day full of goodness and satisfaction; a day where we can say "thank you, God" and feel peace and contentment.  That's worth millions to me.  How about you?

Kindergarten

A good friend of ours has a little girl who has just finished kindergarten.  She is snaggled toothed, smiley, a reader, and cute as a button.  This has been a momentous year for her, as she embraced school and all its challenges and "firsts" and adventures on her own.  And she's done great!  A win/win for her and her parents.

I remember my kindergarten years.  At age 4, I and my friends went to "morning group."  At age 5, we did "afternoon group."  This was in the days of no public kindergarten, so it was of the private variety.  I absolutely loved every minute of it!  I can still see our "room."  It was in the original Norris Community Building, a multi-purpose building of the 1930s era (I think.)  It had hardwood floors, and we had a whole fleet of tricycles inside where we could race around with no fear of hitting walls or pedestrians or anything that was dangerous or valuable.  I can envision our tables and chairs and the outdoor playgound...I can even "smell" the place...a combination of paste, clay, and tempera paint!

In 1953 and 1954, our curriculum was certainly not like today's kindergartener's.  We didn't learn to read or add and subtract.  But it was good for us socially and emotionally.  We learned to be independent, to listen, to share, to be creative.  And we learned manners, right from wrong, and appropriate behavior.

I'm sure you've read, All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten by Robert Fulghum.  I highly recommend the book; even a re-read if it's been a while.  It should be required reading, in my opinion, for we could use an extra dose of civility in the world in which we live.  Too often, folks are unkind, rude, too outspoken, selfish, unwilling to compromise, to see the other's person's view, to consider the other guy might just be right.  If we could learn and live this credo, its wisdom might just be about all that's necessary to live a meaningful life.

So, here goes: 

Share everything.
Play fair.
Don't hit people.
Put things back where you found them.
Clean up your own mess.
Don't take things that aren't yours.
Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.
Wash your hands before you eat.
Flush.
Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.
Live a balanced life - learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.
Take a nap every afternoon.
When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together.
Be aware of wonder.  Remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup:  The roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.
Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup - they all die.  So do we.
And then remember the Dick and Jane books and the first word you learned --the biggest word of all--LOOK.

Everything you need to know is in there somewhere.  The Golden Rule and love and basic sanitation.  Ecology and politics and equality and sane living.

Here's to some good reading; 197 pages of wisdom, pure and simple.  May God convict each of us with its lessons and teach us anew to be good to one another.  Life is short, and we need to live each day to its fullest, without regret.  Carpe diem, my friends!  Long live kindergarten and its wonderful, necessary life-lessons!

Goodness

It's May, the month of goodness.  I think we all want to be good, to do good, to share goodness with others.  Sometimes that's hard.  Especially when we're hurt or distressed or in the middle of adversity.  That's when we tend to be our "real" selves.  It's been said that you can tell a lot about a person when they're under pressure or in the middle of great adversity.  I don't much like that, but it's often true.  Put a person in a pressure cooker and watch how they act.  Many times it's not a very graceful...or grace-filled...sight.  That's when the anger and short temper and selfishness often appear.  Sad but true.

So how do we be "good"  when the pressure is on?

How can we look beyond ourselves and focus on goodness?

We can be good.  We can speak goodness instead of ugly, hurtful words. We can have good attitudes instead of spiteful ones.  We can think of others instead of ourselves.  We can have our priorities straight and look out for the best interests of others.  We can speak truth in love.  We don't have to sacrifice our principles in order to keep the peace.

How?  With God's help.  Through His Spirit, we can be fruitful.  We can walk in His footsteps and be more like Him.  We can be good.

On the last page of scripture, in Revelation 22, God says, "On either side of the river is the tree of life with its twelve kinds of fruit, producing its fruit each month..."  I was amazed at this scripture as it explains my 2013 list of "fruit,"  one for each month, as my resolutions or goals.  I had forgotten this scripture in January when I came up with my list.  Isn't God just like that, to lead us?  I'm grateful and feel confirmed in this. 

So...we now have peace, love, joy, faithfulness and hope, and are working on having goodness in our basket.  Can't wait to see what this basket (my life) will look like at the end of the year.  I'm a work in progress for sure.  Hopefully by 2014, I will be a little more like Him.

Little Ones

I have little ones on my mind this morning...several little people who need our prayers and who are the objects of our praise.  Here they are:  would you join me in celebrating these young lives?

Harper:  two years old today!  She started out life with an emergency delivery at 23-24 weeks gestation.  So tiny...so sick...so fragile.  She is an overcomer for sure and today celebrates her birthday.  Perfectly beautiful...walking...learning...right on target, having overcome so many obstacles and hurdles.  Happy Birthday, sweet girl.

Saxon:  13 years old, battling cancer, fighting hard.  He's such a sweet kid and has had such a hard time with chemo and all that goes with that.  His family is so faithful and is working so hard to give him what he needs in terms of treatment and support and encouragement.  They have great faith and much hope.  He's very fortunate to be in the family that is his.  And the larger family of faith, as well.  Be strong in His love, Saxon.  Many join you in your journey.

Tripp:  I don't know this child but found his story compelling.  While at daycare, a large limb fell from a tree, crushing his skull.  He is now 2 1/2, six months out from the accident.  He is now home, in therapy to help him recover from severe brain damage.  He has a long way to go but has many folks helping him and pulling for him.  A very sad story but one with hope.  Precious little boy...

Drew:  He is 5 months old, at Vanderbilt in the NICU since birth.  Tomorrow is a big day in his life as he undergoes open heart surgery.  He has other health issues, including pulmonary hypertension, which complicate matters greatly.  He is in good hands, with his family, drs and nurses, and with His Heavenly Father in control.  Would you pray for him, please?  His mother, whom we've known since her childhood, is so faithful; reading her blogs is like being in church.  Bless them, one and all.

There are others, but I'll concentrate on those above.  Each child is precious, special, and well-loved.  May God hold them in the palm of His hand and grant to each just exactly what they need.  We trust you, Father, with their care.  And we pray for miracles.  And thank you for your loving care of these dear little ones.

Faithfulness and Hope

Well, we are almost half-way through April and need to touch on our fruit basket for 2013.  We started in January with peace, followed by love in February, and joy in March.  The words for April are "faithfulness" and "hope." 

When making resolutions for this year, I felt led to focus on Fruit of the Spirit.  My thinking was this:  if I can focus on His Spirit and what He leads me to do in my life, I'll certainly have a pretty good year.  Not necessarily in things going like I want them to...or in realizing my dreams...or in winning the lottery, etc.  But in how I cope with things...and how my outlook on things can influence my thoughts, words, and deeds.

So far, so good!  We have certainly had challenges this year.  And I'm still above water!  I have to think that leaning hard on God, being in touch with Him through His spirit, and thanking Him daily for our many blessings has contributed to that fact.  Not that I haven't had my "moments."  I certainly have, when I lose my focus, have a pity party, or fall into worry and negative thinking.  But for the most part, I have felt close to God and in His keeping.

This month, I hope to remain faithful and to have hope for our future.  The two certainly go hand in hand, don't they.  He will be faithful to us!  He will never leave us nor forsake us.  In Him is our hope.  Our hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness.  He is the hope of our world and our hope as we follow Him.   

So, here's to a month of celebrating faithfulness:  His and mine.  Here's to hope for today and for tomorrow.  Though dark clouds may hover, though we get thunder and lightning in our lives, though we have fire to walk through and very high tides and deep rivers to ford, we can nonetheless depend on our heavenly father to strengthen us, to sustain us, to keep us under the protection of His mighty wings.

If He is fully faithful and full of  hope, then we can be, as well.

So, April, here we are.  Peace, love, joy, faithfulness and hope.  Quite a lot of treasured fruit, ours for the partaking.  You are the Creator and Provider.  Thank you for sharing this fruit.  It's just exactly what we need, and we thank you.

Good Reading

I like to read - It's relaxing to me and transports me to different places and times and introduces me to new people in new situations.  Lately, my taste has been in the lines of Christian novels.  Most of them have been set in times long ago.  Francine Rivers has been my author of choice for about the last five books I've read.  She is very talented and her research into settings and history and situations is remarkable.  Each has its dark side, too; a little daunting at times but pretty realistic, as well, I'm sure.

The Mark of the Lion Collection is a trilogy set in Bible times, right after the death of Christ.  The apostle John, who was probably a teenager when Christ was in his early 30s, is still alive.  It is the era of catacombs, gladiators, chariots...when Christians were highly persecuted, imprisoned, thrown into the arena with lions, fed to wild dogs.  I had a hard time getting into the first book because it has numerous characters, all with Latin names, and I had to really concentrate to learn who was who.  But as the story unfolded, I found myself spellbound.  All three books are excellent, captivating, disturbing, set-you-to-thinking jewels.  I'm so glad to have read them.

In a nutshell, each has characters who worship other gods and who, one by one, are converted to Christianity.  Fascinating reading.  It made me realize anew how fortunate we are.  We are free to worship as we choose, be open about our convictions, pretty much free from much persecution.  We take it so for granted, don't we.  They, on the other hand, took their lives in their hands when they professed to be followers of Christ.  Their own families disowned them; they were literally in danger every second of the day.  Can you imagine risking your life, facing roaring lions or mad dogs, by not worshiping idols or mythological gods and goddesses?

The next time I'm tempted to complain about anything, I will remember how horrible it used to be for Christians...and how dangerous it can still be for our missionaries and other Christians living around the world in less-than-friendly environments.  They are in my prayers for sure.  Never will a day go by that I won't thank God for life in America where I'm free to be who I am in Christ.

Another thing I love about the Lion trilogy is the scripture used.  The gospel is shared frequently and well in the conversions.  In Book 3, the entire story of Christianity is shared, in a nutshell.  These would be excellent books to share with someone struggling or searching or lost.  The author does a wonderful job in applying scripture to life situations. Love is the theme...as are hope, patience, honesty, integrity. 

So, if you're in the market for some good reading, head to the bookstore, Amazon, or the Kindle Store and check out The Mark of the Lion Collection by Francine Rivers.  You won't be sorry!

I Know the Answer, But...

It's so frustrating when you have a problem, know the answer to the problem, but you just can't seem to get there.  Case in point:  I'm having a little trouble with anger.  I'm not a very angry person, by nature.  It's takes quite a lot to rile me up!  But when I AM angry, I don't know quite how to handle it.

Growing up, anger wasn't allowed at our house.  It was highly discouraged if not forbidden.  My parents were very uncomfortable with anger, so it was just not allowed.  I accepted that.  But human nature being as it is, anger is going to happen.  So if you're not allowed to have that emotion, what do you do with what's happening?

I don't blame my folks for this.  They had good reason not to like it.  Who does?  They were both rather sensitive by nature and had some experiences in their own upbringing with unpleasant anger experiences in their families...so, the way they handled it was just to not let it happen.

As a result, I pretty much just swallowed it as a child...I know better as an adult.  You HAVE to acknowledge it.  Say, "That makes me angry."  But you DO NOT swallow it.  It eats you alive if you do.

 I know the answer to my current problem:

You get angry but you do not sin.
You do not act inappropriately.
You do not yell at anyone or call them out or curse them.
You do not gossip about them or judge them or wish evil upon them.

You LOVE them.  You are slow to speak.  You forgive.  You pray for them who despitefully use you...or persecute you.

Sounds so easy.  But it's VERY hard, at least for me.  Knowing what to do and doing what you know to do are two different things.

Today, in three different instances, as I struggled with my problem, I was given the exact same answers as listed above!  Talk about more than coincidental.  Since I am very tired of trying hard...and very tired of having ugly thoughts...and very tired of being mad at myself for being so unChristlike...I am giving this over to God and asking Him humbly to just take it.  He is sovereign.  He is all-seeing and all-knowing.  He is powerful and good and loving.  He can do it.  He can help me do it.

So there it is.  I already feel better.  Free and clean and good.  

Early Morning Thoughts...

I'm sitting at the computer, watching it snow!  Big, beautiful, fluffy flakes, on March 25 no less!  Daffodils are blooming, as are the Bradford Pears...kind of pretty, amongst the snow.  Last week I sported shorts and flip-flops.  It was in Florida, to be sure, but it's somewhat relevant because it has been a strange spring there, as well.  One day:  warm, almost hot...next day:  cool, windy, rainy.  Not typical of our picture-perfect springtime with warm days and for sure, no snow :)

Although Spring officially begins March 20 or 21st, my wise mother always waited til Mother's Day to begin springtime planting, gardening, etc.  Experience had taught her not to believe it was actually here too early on.  I am ALWAYS tempted to hit the garden centers as soon as we have one warm day...but I've learned, the hard way, what can happen.  Money down the drain, as well as time and effort, when we get those gardens started too soon.  There will be more cold...and freezes...and even snow!  So I'll wait this year.

Easter will be here Sunday, and I've been thinking lots about this most important day.  Without Christ's resurrection, Christianity would have no meaning.  We would have no chance at eternal life.  The story would be incomplete.  We can get caught up in deep theology when thinking and discussing Easter, but boiling it down to the simple fact that Jesus died for us, with all our sins upon Him, then was raised from the dead to live forever and to allow us to live forever is what it's all about.  I told Barrett the story last week, in 3-year-old words...then followed it up reading the Easter story from his Bible story book.  He got a sad look on his face when we read about the crucifixion...then smiled widely when Jesus appeared to Mary in the garden.  Alive again!  Wonderful news.  He understood, as well as a little child can, that Jesus died and was buried but came to life again on Easter Sunday.  He'll understand better, by and by.  And what all this means for him in his life.

This Holy Week we'll focus on Jesus' last days and on His sacrifice for us...on His experiences, His suffering, His words, His death and His Resurrection.  Sobering times followed by joy.  One end of the spectrum to the other.  Like days in springtime, from cold and freezing to warm and sunny, we will experience it all.  And just like springtime, we will come through this week with a bright outlook for our futures.  We may go through times of suffering, disappointment, questions without answers and come through these times with bright hopes for our futures.

Thank you, God, for springtime...for a time of renewal, of beginning again.  Thank you for Jesus' ultimate sacrifice for us.  Because He lives, we can face tomorrow.  Because He lives, all fear is gone.  Because I know He holds the future, and life is worth the living just because He lives!

Shhh! Quiet time...

For many years I tried, really tried, to establish a pattern for my quiet time with God.  I tried journaling, with no real success; surprising, as I love to write...but it just wasn't effective nor satisfying.  I tried reading the Bible through, and it just turned into something rather rote and uninspiring, although I did get some knowledge from the experience.  I tried using The Book of Common Prayer and several hymnals...interesting and a good experience, but still not what I was looking for.

Then this fall, I was shown a devotion book that was written in first person God.  It really spoke to me!  So I got a blank book (actually, I had one that a dear daughter had given me :) and began my journey into reading a devotion and the Bible and writing down what it was saying to ME!  It has been so awesome.  I start out with Max Lucado's Grace for the Moment...then move onto my journal...then use a tiny little picture album of mostly family, where I pray for each one using the theme of the devotional to start with.  For example, if the topic is God's Grace, then I pray for God's grace to be upon my husband, our children, our grandchild, etc. Then I go onto my Bible reading and end up with my favorite online devotion:  d365.  It has turned out to be so rewarding.  I am reaping blessings galore with this quiet time with the Lord. 

One day, I'll look back at my now not-blank book, with my journaling from 2013, and remember with gratitude a time in my life when one of my greatest pleasures began.  This has been a long time coming, and I am enjoying it immensely, looking forward to the early morning and my special time alone with God.  It sets the stage for my day.  It is more-than-coincidentally just what I need each and every day.

So I'll just praise God for showing me the way and pass what is working for me to you, my reader friends.   And I say better late than never in finding my way into this wonderful, quiet encounter that is enriching my life so very much.

Something to REALLY think about...

Next time any of us lapses into a personal pity party, we might want to think about counting our blessings.  It's part of our human nature, I know, to wish things that are unpleasant would go away...that our lives would be void of unpleasantness of any kind...that happiness would get here and stay.

But reality tells us that this is NOT real.  Life is full of disappointment, unrealized dreams, far-from-fairy tale endings.  It's a journey, for sure.  And hard at times.  I understand that, for others and for us.

But you know, there are those in our lives or in our circle of friends that REALLY have it tough.  A young woman we know - our son's age - who is in a situation that truly is heartrending.  Her baby was born with multiple challenges and has been in the hospital since his birth in November.  He very well may celebrate his first birthday there.  She spends most of her time there, with occasional trips to Knoxville to be with her husband and kindergartener.  You can only imagine what the hospital bill is.  You can only imagine how stressed she and her family must be, with a critically ill child, separation, finances, etc.  Yet she has the greatest faith and expressions of it I have ever seen.  It is truly humbling to read her blogs on Caringbridge...like being in church.  It is inspiring and uplifting and worshipful.

I am so proud of her.  She has captured my heart and put my life and its ups and down into perspective.  Not only do I count my blessings more...but I truly empathize and see my life and things in it so much more clearly.

A person can have joy in his/her life, even in the midst of very hard circumstances.  If a person has a personal relationship with Christ...if they can trust and hope and believe in God's presence in their life, if they have given their hurts and challenges and circumstances to Him, then they can truly face the future with true hope and faith.  It makes all the difference in their outlook.  It's the calm within the storm, the peace that passes understanding. 

So, let's get outside ourselves and think of others who have it so much worse in their situations.  Let's learn from those who are trusting and leaving it to God and who inspire us with His hope.  Thinking of others first not only helps them but puts our own problems into perspective.  Thank you, God, for lessons learned.  May you keep our friends in your care and heal their child.  Care for them in ways You alone can...and may we give of ourselves to them, being Your hands and feet on this earth, Your servants, sharing of ourselves with them.  It can only lessen their stress, increase their joy, and bring glory to You.

It's March!

Well, February - Love Month - has come and gone, and March is upon us.  January was the month of peace, February love, and for March, think joy!  Now that's a happy thought, isn't it.  With all the cold and bad weather and more than a little bad news, with deaths, illness, the economic problems and personal difficulties happening, we can all use a little joy, can't we.

I'm enjoying the fruit basket we're assembling in 2013.  It's been fun to see how many times a day I'm reminded of the current month's theme.  In January, I kept coming upon scripture about peace...even when I was not looking or thinking about it.  Same thing in February, about love.  So I'm excited to see what new and inspiring things come my way this month, the month of joy.

Joy is indeed a fruit of the Holy Spirit.  It is kin to happiness but so much more.  I've seen folk search for happiness and not find it...then be completely filled with joy, a gift from God, when they accept His love.  It's a spiritual thing, for sure.  Some search and search, trying this way and that, to find happiness, to no avail.  It isn't found in the things of this world, nor in material things, nor in individuals or experiences.  Perhaps momentarily, but nothing that lasts or that is of eternal value.  It's very sad to watch folk who are searching in all the wrong places for something that God so wishes to grant, if they would only look up to Him.  Conversely, it's the best present in the world to see a person whose joy is just overflowing, even in the midst of hard times and sad times. as well as in the good times.

It's joy that is contagious...uplifting...strengthening...healing.  It's joy that is obvious when someone who might be sad or depressed or overcome or devastated actually makes you feel better, when you've come to cheer them up or comfort them.  It's joy that shows in one's countenance...that brings a smile...that is tangible to all around.

So as winter's gloomy days hang on, open yourself up to God and His gift of joy.  It can come in the morning, after a long, sleepless night.  It can make someone's day, to observe you exuding that wonderful sense of joy.  Joy, pure and unadulterated, is just about the best medicine there is to heal a broken heart or to turn doubts around.  Seek it; ask for it; enjoy it; be thankful for it; treasure it; share it!

Here's to a heart filled with joy.  Make this a joy-filled and joyful month as we fill the bowl of our lives with God's wonderful fruit of the Spirit...peace, love, joy and more to come in the months ahead. 

Mid-February

Good morning, on this mid-February day.  To most, it's Valentine's Day...the day 'o love.  A fun day for children, with its parties and cards and good-things-to-eat.  I remember it fondly:  the little paperbag containers for the Valentines...the little candy hearts with words on them, lots of chocolate, etc etc.  I remember having mixed feelings about it as a teenager, pre-John.  Feeling a little left out, a little lonely when others were getting flowers and gifts.  I am grateful for sweet remembrances from our children:  cookies and cards and sweet words of affirmation.  I LOVE my flowers and sweet cards from my sweet husband.  Anything given in love is heart-warming and so appreciated.

I remember one Valentines when a local school sold flowers for $1.  Some of the kids had literally lapfuls of them at the end of the day...and some had none :(  Not such a great idea on the part of the school, in my opinion.  Why set up some kids for sad feelings...whose idea was that??

Besides being Valentines, it's also the second day of Lent.  Having grown up in a church where the Christian calendar is observed everyday of the year, I have vivid memories of Lent....giving up things, saving money in my Mite box...celebrating every Sunday as a little Easter...Shrove Tuesday with its pancakes, Ash Wednesday and the imposition of ashes; we were humbled with the ash cross on our foreheads and its meaning...to keep close to our hearts during the 40 days to follow...the darkness which would be followed by the great light of Easter at Christ's resurrection.  I'm so pleased that churches other than Anglican ones now participate in Advent and Lent and other meaningful and wonderful times of preparation and emphasis.  It greatly adds to the Christian experience and growth.

So today, we celebrate love...traditional and spiritual.  Since it is Love Month, I'll close with some sweet words of love:

- Love never gives up.
- Love cares more for others than for self.
- Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
- Love doesn't strut.
- Love doesn't have a swelled head
- Doesn't force itself on others.
- Isn't always "me first."
- Doesn't fly off the handle.
- Doesn't keep score of the sins of others.
- Doesn't revel when others grovel.
- Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth.
- Puts up with anything.
- Trusts God always.
- Always looks for the best,
- Never looks back,
- But keeps going to the end...

Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. 
And the best of the three is LOVE!

From I Corinthians 13 - The Message